


You Should Be Alive

by allonsysilvertongue



Category: Hayffie - Fandom, Hunger Games (2012), Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins
Genre: Coma, F/M, Hayffie, Post Mockingjay, Unconsciousness, mind
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-14
Updated: 2012-12-14
Packaged: 2017-11-21 02:46:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/592577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allonsysilvertongue/pseuds/allonsysilvertongue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Effie and Haymitch are separated by a huge void. "Panem is so much better now and it'll get even better in the coming years, and sweetheart, you should be alive to see it."</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Should Be Alive

 

_It's a place where nothing matters, where you have no concept of time and you float in this abyss, free from things that anchor a mortal. But after a while, you begin to realize that you want nothing more than to be governed by the rules and shrouded by the uncertainties that so often plague a man, and the minute trivial details that wrap itself slowly around a human life. Because what you have now is not living; you merely exist._

* * *

And Effie knew it, too. To lead a mere existence without the things that made you human was more painful that anything she ever had to go through; to be alive but not living.

Effie stood up and dusted her skirt when she heard his voice. Pulled forward by the deep baritone voice of a man who had kept her company, she moved closer towards the source, allowing it to guide her.

The wood beneath her feet cracked as she stepped lightly on it, and there were holes on what was once a beautiful parquet flooring. Effie walked carefully and kept her eyes on the floor, worried that her feet might get caught in one of the holes. There were mosses growing up on some parts of the house, yellow and decaying. Ducking her head, she slipped past a door swaying precariously on its hinges and walked down another poorly lit corridor.

The voice grew louder and Effie knew she was near. Her heart started beating faster, the excitement coursing through her. This was her favourite part of being trapped in this house; the only good to come out of this void – his visits and listening to his gruff soliloquy.

"… the children send their hellos, of course. They want me to tell you that they miss you. I am not a messenger, Effie. So if you could just…"

He trailed off and afraid she might miss something of importance, Effie hurried along the corridor. It was always the same with him. It would always start with him complaining about having to pass messages or sending someone's regards to her, and that there were other better things for him to do.

When she finally reached the slightly cramped room lit only by a single candle slowly burning out the wick, she was slightly out of breath. An old rocking chair that creaked each time it moved occupied a corner of the room. That was the most perfect room in the entire architecture of the place because it was in that room that Effie could hear him the loudest and clearest. It made her feel as though he was here with her.

_Haymitch_ , she breathed out his name. But, of course, he couldn't hear her. Nobody could and nobody even knew that she was there.

Effie often wished that she could see him, place a face to his voice because it had been so long and she was beginning to forget how he looked like. She was beginning to forget how  _she_  looked like. It was so strange because there were no mirrors in that house, no reflective surface to remind her of who she was.

"They're rebuilding the school in District Twelve and there will be new people from the districts employed to teach in that school. Can you imagine it, Eff? All these people from the different districts relocating and living all over Panem," his voice informed her.

_That's good_ , she nodded her head in approval.  _Maybe it's time to get rid of the Districts, don't you think, Haymitch? We could all be Panem - one country, undivided._

"… as long as they stay out of my way, I suppose it wouldn't be much of a problem," Haymitch continued, unaware of her little voice carrying on the conversation.

Effie shook her head sadly at that. He had always been such a recluse since the day she first met him. There was only so much socializing and human contact that he could tolerate before he had to take time off for himself. They were worlds apart. She loved being around people, it made her feel belonged which was why being in this abandoned house all alone was the cruelest form of torture. Solitary confinement.

_Don't be that way, you should socialize and meet with new people. It gets so lonely in here sometimes. You have no idea how much I yearn to be in the presence of another human. To be able to talk to them, see them and touch them. But you can, Haymitch! Don't you see it? And you shouldn't waste it._

Outside, Effie felt the pressure of Haymitch's hand as it slipped into hers, his lips pressing against her inner wrist where her pulse beat weakly.

"I don't know if you can hear me, Effie, but ah… Well, the doctors said you would be able to. I don't know, seems stupid though. But if you can, listen up, sweetheart - you gotta wake up. You've been sleeping for so long. Remember what you always screamed at me during the Games?  _Don't be lazy – up, up, up_."

She couldn't help the giggles coming out from her mouth. His impersonation of her supposed Capitol accent was so terrible!

"Damn it, look what you've made me do, Trinket. I'm talking to someone who can't talk back. I'm talking to a patient in a coma."

She heard him give a derisive snort and imagined him shaking his head. The sound of the chair scraping against the floor as he stood up alerted her to the fact that he was probably leaving and she panicked for a moment. He usually stayed longer than that.

_No, I can hear you! I'm right here, Haymitch. Please, I'm listening. Don't go, not yet. Please._

He leaned forwards to kiss her forehead and she caught the whiff of alcohol on his breath as she lay unmoving on the hospital bed.

"Next time, sweetheart."

The door closed with a soft click and Effie was once again left alone.

* * *

As the days stretched, the longer she spent comatose in the hospital, the more her mind began to deteriorate. She noticed how the colours faded slowly over time until all that was left were old brown wooden planks and dusty drapes. Everything around her seemed so dull where she was as she slowly began to lose hope. The absence of colour disturbed her greatly.

Effie found out soon after she entered into her coma that her mind was apparently a huge abandoned house and with nothing else to occupy her, she had explored every inch of it. Her exploration led to a startling discovery; there were no doors to lead her out of the house.

It was said that doors were portals to another world so if she could just find one, she could leave that place. She could be free, and she would wake up to the world. To Haymitch.

In all honesty, she wasn't even sure how she ended up confined in the dilapidated house which looked like it was on the verge of collapsing. All she remembered was walking down a street with a paper bag filled with groceries before she felt a pain so terrible that she collapsed on the ground and lay on the sidewalk unable to move. When the paramedics came and asked for her name, she couldn't respond but she felt the blood trickling down her spine. The pain faded as she lost consciousness.

When she woke up next – or what she thought was her "waking up" – she found out that she was in a hospital. Effie gleaned enough information from the voices around her to know that she was a victim of an angry, vindictive Capitol citizen who detested the new government. That man had exacted revenge on people like her who had a hand in the Rebellion. In his eyes, she was a traitor. They caught him a few months after the incident and as Haymitch told her during one of his many visits, he wouldn't be coming out anytime soon.

* * *

"Good morning, darling. How are you today? Still a sleeping beauty, aren't you?"

Effie rolled her eyes when she heard the chipper, high-pitched voice of Nurse Stone echoing within the walls of her mind. She was certain that pun was intended.

"Well, I'm just going to change your clothes and oh, replace your IV drip for now. You wouldn't feel a thing," the nurse narrated as she went about doing exactly that.

Despite what she said, Effie did feel the needle poking into her elbow although she couldn't exactly feel the pain.

That was the other thing about this miniature version of her hell – while she could feel pressure and sense things, she couldn't exactly feel anything. At first, it was a truly terrifying thing to discover but after a while, it just felt odd. It made her feel even more detached from the "real world" – a term that she had used to describe the world where Haymitch and everyone else existed. Strange could not even begin to cover the depth of her feelings for what she was currently going through – having a world in her own mind, while her physical body existed outside.

Where she was – her world – there was nothing. She could not feel hot or cold, pain or the absence of pain. She hardly felt thirsty or hungry and she couldn't remember the last time she even had anything to eat.

"Your Haymitch is waiting outside, of course. He's a faithful one - that grumpy, difficult man - coming over to see you every month for the past year. Did you love him, darling, as much as he loves you? He must love you to be doing what he does."

Effie snorted at that but couldn't help the slow smile dancing on her lips as she heard  _your Haymitch_. Haymitch, love and her did not belong in one sentence. Haymitch hated her and the Rebellion may have thawed some of that hatred towards her but Effie doubted he was in love with her. His actions led to a lot of questioning and confusion on her part as she wondered why he kept visiting her.

After a while, like everything else, Effie began to expect his presence, looked forward to it even. She even enjoyed his company, his sarcastic, caustic remarks and his witty dry humour. How could she not realise all these when they had spent years working together? Perhaps if they hadn't spent so much time disagreeing and fighting with each other, she would have realised it sooner. It was difficult to accept someone when they have constantly tried to undermine you.

"I think it's time you wake up, my dear. Don't you want to go home and be with him?"

She wished Nurse Stone would hurry up and leave so he could come in. The nurse wiped Effie's face with wet cloth, tucked the blanket properly, adjusted her bed and smoothened out her hair with a brush.

"There, there. Now you look presentable for him," she whispered.

Effie figured that Nurse Stone was one of those people that had the best intentions at heart which also meant that she could be extremely overbearing in nature. There was no need to doubt Effie's fondness for Mrs. Regina Stone, for she was the nurse assigned to Effie and aside from Haymitch, the only regular voice to keep her company but that woman could be intense at times.

Effie was already waiting in the room she frequently occupied and was sitting on her rocking chair as she waited for him.

"No, Mrs. Stone, I don't need coffee. Thank you," she heard Haymitch politely turning down the offer for coffee. She realised that Mrs. Stone was the only person Haymitch bothered to be polite to. It could be because she was the person who took great care of Effie while he was away.

"Not sure how you could stand that woman, Effie. All the whiskey in the world couldn't drown her voice out, you know. But, I supposed, it's not really a problem to you. You can't really hear us, can you?"

Effie laughed and rested her head on her propped arm as she waited for him to continue. Thatwasn't the first time that Haymitch acted contradictorily to what he believed in. He often seemed to be having an internal crisis for she could tell that he had not once believed that a coma patient was capable of hearing. The doctors had repeatedly told him to continue trying and to keep talking to her. He had his misgivings, but he did it anyway despite feeling slightly foolish. He told that much to Effie one day.

"Remember the school I was telling you about last month? Yeah, well, it's opening in three days' time and they're having some sort of opening ceremony. I've been forced to go. Damn those kids," he paused and cleared his throat uncomfortably. "You would like it, I think. You love this sort of social event, don't you?"

She nodded. After a stretch of silence, she heard him gave a long suffering sigh.

"I can't keep doing this, Eff. Everyone's telling me you're never waking up and I … I don't know. I keep thinking that they're right. Are they? The doctors told me to keep talking to you, that maybe you're in there somewhere. But it's stupid, sweetheart. It's a long shot."

Effie jumped to her feet and began pacing the room, gnawing her lips worriedly. She had no idea where Haymitch was coming from, why the sudden change in behaviour and thoughts but it spelt trouble for her.

_The doctors are right, Haymitch, I'm right here. Don't listen to what others say! Don't lose hope, please, I beg –_

"I can't keep doing this," he repeated himself. "Katniss thinks I'm torturing myself hoping you'd wake up. And she's not the only one. They say that I… I should let you go. I don't even know why I'm holding on to you. I mean, we've never gotten along all these while, have we? But I…"

Effie stopped pacing and stood still to listen.

"It's just… It's tiring, Effie, you know? It's tiring to keep hoping that things will get better, that they'd find a new medicine that would help or some other miracle to wake you up. But there's nothing out there and it's draining me. May be it's time for me to accept that I've lost you and that you're never coming back."

The Haymitch Abernathy she knew would never be caught dead talking about how he felt. He would not have revealed that he did in fact, has a heart despite his total indifference to anyone or anything other than how much alcohol he put into his system. The knowledge and his staunch belief that Effie couldn't hear him probably allowed him to drop his walls for a moment and simply be human.

This vulnerability he was displaying was new and alarming all at the same time. Effie was afraid and she had not felt this afraid in a long time, safe in the knowledge that if she couldn't leave the house than nothing could enter and harm her.

Then Haymitch said something that shattered her heart. Her legs gave out and she collapsed on the floor, sobbing into her hand.

"It would have been better for you to have died that day, Effie. You wouldn't have to suffer like this."

_You can't mean that, Haymitch_ , she sobbed pitifully.  _You don't really want me dead._

"Panem is so much better now and it'll get even better in the coming years, and sweetheart, you should be alive to see it," he whispered as he stroked her hair.

The unbearable sadness she felt at those words gripped her heart. The tears fell silently down her cheeks as she realised that in his state of despair, Haymitch had finally given up. She knew now that not only did he thought she would be better off dead, he didn't even believe that she was still alive. Just a body without a soul, just existing.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart. I'm so sorry. I'm really shit at this goodbye stuffs, aren't I?"

After her parents had gotten divorced, her mother had told her that it was easier feeling angry and easier still to keep feeding the anger than to give in to the sadness because anger gave you a drive to keep on fighting. Sadness sapped the life out of you.

_You bastard! You're going to leave me! I didn't ask me to be like this, Haymitch! This isn't by choice! I don't even know what happened to me. I didn't ask for this, I didn't. Do you understand? How could you?_

"I can't say I know what you want. But I think – I think, you wouldn't want me to waste my life away. And, what must you think if you knew the disgusting, rude old drunk has been visiting you? You'd hate me, you'll slap me, I figured. I – "

She didn't know what he wanted to say before he stopped abruptly. What he said next was what mattered most. A finality.

"Goodbye, Effie Trinket," he whispered and kissed her lips, for the first time and also what seemed to be the last time.

"Already leaving, Mr. Abernathy?" asked Nurse Stone who came in to check on her.

"Yeah, I am. You take care of her, Mrs Stone."

"Oh you know, I will. See you next month."

_There won't be a next month_ , Effie said bitterly, still reeling from the pressure of his lips on hers. Snapping out of her stupor, she felt the anger once again and started hitting her hands repeatedly against the sofa, crying and screaming.

* * *

By the end of the week, half of the house had collapsed. Effie wondered ifit was an indication that either her consciousness was dying or that her physical body outside was. Seizing that rare bit of opportunity, Effie scrambled and tried climbing the fallen beams and debris from the collapsed part of the house towards the abandoned backyard which she knew existed outside. That backyard has a trail which led to some place deep in the woods and she was convinced that that was her way out. She failed that night when a thick wooden beam had collapsed mere inches from where she was standing. The impact had thrown her back towards the old house. Now there was a wooden beam blocking her way. She couldn't leave and that meant that she couldn't wake up. Outside, her physical body went through a seizure - something that had not happened since she was admitted to hospital.

Months passed and Haymitch never returned. Effie's overprotective nurse grew angry on her behalf and ranted about how irresponsible and rude it was of Haymitch to just abandon "a poor, helpless girl."

She bristled at that description but it warmed her heart to know that at least someone would stand by her.

As her mood began to rapidly deteriorate, a dark forbidding haze had settled over the house. Effie had never bothered to venture outside the room she had ensconced herself in secretly hoping that Haymitch would come back and if he did, she wouldn't want to miss it. In her world, there was no need for her to sleep, and she spent most days staring blankly ahead of her as she sat on the rickety old rocking chair. The thick grey haze was another reason that she hardly moved. It disrupted her vision and prevented her from going anywhere.

"We're starting you on some new medicine, my dear. You're not looking too well. Your heart seems to be failing. Well, I would say a broken heart but Dr. August will only laugh at me, that young clueless boy. Don't mind me, my dear, I'm an old woman and it upsets me seeing young love falling apart like this. What do you kids know about romance nowadays?"

Effie nodded glumly; her finger tracing random patterns through the cloudy haze as she listened to the old batty nurse talking to herself.

"What they're giving you is a new drug. I was told that it has to be taken with the previous medicine given to you three months ago. It's supposed to help you and at this juncture, the doctors are willing to try if it's meant to help. The drug is in the early stages of development and I really do hope it's successful, my dear. I was told you have very pretty eyes and I would love to see them for myself. Haymitch told me that himself, of course."

_He thought I have pretty eyes?_

Effie had had some time to think for herself and mulled over Haymitch's words. She understood now what he meant and it was truly unfair for her to shackle him down to her when she was of significance to him. Effie wasn't his wife or partner and she had no right to expect him to stay be her side. She was lost in her own mind but he could still live his life in this new world. He deserved it after all that he had been through.

It hadn't been easy but Effie had months to let go of her anger.

The promising drug did not work. Whatever outcome they hoped to achieve, in her opinion, it had not been successful since she was still in a state of solitary confinement.

The medical team however seemed to have an abundance of hope where she had none. They increased the dosage and marvel at the effects it had on her. Apparently from what she gathered from Nurse Stone's monologue, Effie's vitals looked promising, her heart seemed to be stronger and beating at the regular pace. All in all, she was slowly regaining her health despite being in a coma. How could she forget, she was informed by a rather excited Nurse Stone that there seemed to be a perk in her brain wave activities, whatever that meant.

"You seem to have regained some colour on your cheeks, my dear! It's the medicine, I'm sure!"

Effie wasn't so sure for she had long given up on any medicinal treatment to cure her. Despite that fact, Effie began to gain her spirit back as she reconciled the fact that Haymitch was lost to her and that there was no use pining over him. There was nothing to be done, not while she was stuck in her head. She vowed to find a way out, if there was any.

There had to be.

It took her days to realize that the black smog surrounding her had slowly but surely thinned out and she could once again see clearly and breathe easier. The place seemed brighter and the lights, oh, the house had never been so brightly lit before. Effie wasn't sure what all of it meant – was she getting better or was it an indication that she was dying? There were so many books that described the white lights when someone died, books that she had read before her escort job became too consuming. She had no idea what it meant and wasn't too bothered about it for she was too enthralled by the changes to question them too much.

* * *

One day, he returned. He strode into the hospital room as though he had never left.

Effie sat bolt upright when she heard the familiar heavy footsteps moving closer to her bed and when he spoke, she cried out in disbelief.

"Are you sure?" he had asked.

"Yes, it happened this morning, her fingers moved and I called you straight away!" came the excited voice of her nurse.

_Haymitch! I – what? I moved my fingers?_

"I'll leave you two alone."

"Hello, Effie."

_Oh, Haymitch! I'm so glad you're here! You come back! You're really here, aren't you?_

"You look healthier, Eff. I'm … I'm glad. I don't know what happened, but that nurse said you moved your fingers. Did you really do that, sweetheart?"

_I don't know, Haymitch._

"It took me leaving you for you to move, huh? May be I shouldn't come back. Maybe you'd wake up, then," he chuckled.

_Don't joke about things like that. It was so lonely without you. I've missed you._

He didn't speak to her for the rest of the day but she knew he was in the room with her. Sometimes, she heard him take a drink from the bottle he had sneaked in to the hospital and when it came to Haymitch, Nurse Stone closed an eye to his debauchery. She was such a soft-hearted nurse, a romantic at heart. At times, if she was lucky she would feel his hand pressing against her palm as he held it.

She moved again that night. A jerk of her hand which caught Haymitch by surprise.

"Do that again, sweetheart. Can you do that again?"

Of course she couldn't. She wasn't even aware of her limbs moving or jerking.

* * *

"Look, what's the point of having her stay permanently here? It's depressing."

That was Peeta. She still recognised his sweet voice. He was there in her hospital room in a heated argument with Doctor August, Haymitch and Nurse Stone. Katniss was there, too. Effie heard her mumbling something she couldn't quite catch, but mostly, the girl opted to stay out of the discussion.

"Effie, if you're awake, I bet my bow you'd tell them to have some manners," Katniss whispered to her ear.

She laughed out loud at that. Oh, she missed them very much. Now that they were all here, gathered in her room, she realised that she missed them all more than anything.

"You're not a doctor, Peeta. You can't know what's good for her," Haymitch's voice thundered over Peeta's.

"There's a hospital in Twelve, Haymitch. If there is an emergency we could easily get her there."

"Our facilities here in the Capitol are better, Mr. Mellark. I'm not saying that the hospital in District Twelve aren't good enough, I'm just saying that we are well equipped and the doctors here know the patient. I wouldn't advise moving her at all, much less fly her on a hovercraft to Twelve."

"With all due respect, Dr. August. She is someone we know. She is Effie Trinket. Did you hear yourself? She's just another patient to you. Another body in a hospital bed," Peeta replied hotly.

Effie was never aware that Peeta could be that aggressive but perhaps, the war changed him like how it changed her. Both of them had shared a bond over their time in Capitol prison and she had nearly gone insane when he was rescued while she was left to the mercies of the Capitol.

Right now, she could only hope that Haymitch and Peeta won the argument because she wanted to go to Twelve and be with them.

"Two and a half years ago when I asked that she be moved to District Twelve under our care, and you said no, I listened to you because I knew at that time, her injuries were the main concern. And I admit that it would have been better for her to be under the Capitol's medical attention. But that was two years ago. Two and half years later, she's still in a coma. The only difference is that her injuries are no longer life threatening. She should be with the people who care about her, not that you people don't but what I meant was people who are like family to her. She should be with us," Peeta argued his case.

"Peeta," Haymitch warned the boy.

"It's only right, Haymitch. She took care of us, now it's our turn to take care of her."

It was so disconcerting to listen to these conversations as they talked about her as though she wasn't there. The argument continued heatedly until Nurse Stone stepped up and volunteered her services.

"If you're moving Effie to Twelve then I'm coming with her. You said there is a spare house at Victor's Village? We could stay there and I'll be her full time nurse. She would be in capable hands, Dr. August. She is such a dear and I can't bear to watch her leave."

_I can't bear it if they return to Twelve without me. What if I can get out of this house? What if I wake up? Then Dr. August would be able to see that I don't need to be held in the hospital!_

With that sudden burst of determination, Effie ran out of the room straight towards the collapsed half of the house. She was once again faced with the wooden beam that had blocked her way.

Effie had never fought so hard in her life but she wanted to go to Twelve with them. She was sick of being alone. With her bare hands, in an almost possessed manner, she cleared the rubbles and fallen debris making a small path in front of her. All that was left was the wooden beam.

Effie grunted and pushed the heavy beam blocking her away. Her muscles stretched and pulled as she exerted all the strength that she could muster. Beads of perspiration rolled down her back. The beam moved by an inch or so and she pushed harder and her hand slipped causing her to fall face first on the dirt.

She could still hear them arguing, their voices echoing faintly.

"This is not a good idea. Miss Trinket is not in a position to make her own decisions. The State is responsible for her," Dr. Aurelius told them impatiently.

"Well, what if we get the State's approval to move her?" Haymitch challenged.

"You're going to go to the President?" the doctor asked disbelievingly.

_Move, Effie. If you just wake up, you could make your own decisions. You don't need the State or Haymitch or Peeta or Dr. August to lord their decisions over your head. You could do it all if you just wake the hell up._

The desperation consumed her and filled her with fire. Her muscles were sore, she was exhausted and out of breath but she couldn't give up. Not now, not when the only thing blocking her way was a wretched architectural object.

From where she was standing, leaning against the wall to catch her breath, she could see the backyard with its brown, dried and dead grasses. There was a stream of light, so blindingly bright at the other end of the backyard. If she could just get to it, Effie was sure she would wake up. She wasn't sure what that light was. It could be her saving grace or it could harm her but she was willing to risk it all.

At the end of the day she would have an ending to this madness. She would be alive and out of her coma, or the light could be a danger and kill her.

With a groan and final push, the beam moved and created a space large enough for her to slip through. Effie gave a triumphant cry of relief before dropping to her knees and crawling out of the small space.

Her palms hurt from the small stones digging into her skin but she didn't let it bother her. She was on the other side of the house. She had made it out. Effie stood up and turned around briefly towards what had been her prison for the past year. Quickly, she ran through the backyard towards the light. She was so close that the searing heat emanating from the lights burnt her skin.

But that was the least of her worries. Something else was in her way, something unknown drawing her back to the house - a nagging feeling that told her, assured her repeatedly that it would be safer to come back. Nobody knew what lay beyond that light. It whispered to her seductively, urging for her to turn around back to the relative safety of the house because that was wiser than running forward blindly towards the unknown.

_No._

In that moment, Haymitch's words from months ago replayed itself in her head.

_I can't do this anymore. This is not living. I'm still alive. I'm not dead, I'm not dead. I want to live, not just survive. I'll prove to Haymitch that he was wrong – I'll prove to him that I'm still I'm alive. I'm alive and I'm coming home._

The lights consumed her and filled every fibre of her being. Effie screamed as every bone in her body felt like it was on fire. Her blood boiled and her muscles twist.

In the real world, she had a seizure. Her body shook the hospital bed. Nobody noticed it, too occupied with the decision over her life. Nobody except Katniss who was sitting on her bed and watched in horror as Effie convulsed in bed.

Despite her pain, Effie felt Katniss' hands pushing down on her shoulder.

"Effie! Oh god, Effie calm down. Haymitch! Peeta! Help me," Katniss pleaded.

It took a while for them to hear her. She felt more hands, pinning her down and in her world, she felt those hands as hands that were trying to pull her back into the house. She fought harder and kept on running through the lights.

His face was the first face she saw. The most exquisite, familiar thing she had ever laid eyes on after years of being alone. That angry frown, the way his eyebrows crinkled in concentration, his tightly clenched jaw, the anger from the fight moments ago and the panic swirling in his dark grey eyes were all details that she would remember for the rest of her life.

"Haymitch," she whispered, exhausted.

Every movement in the room ceased at the sight of her. Everyone stared at her as though they had just seen a ghost. Katniss had jumped back in surprised and fell back on the chair. Nurse Stone gave a squeak of delight and surprise. Peeta gaped at her before snapping his mouth shut and smiled. Dr. August had left the room when her seizure started, presumably to get other doctors.

Haymitch stood as still as a statue, staring into her sapphire blue eyes.

"Haymitch," she said again. She had to tell him and let him know.

He snapped out of his trance and he moved forward placing his ear inches from her lips.

"I've heard you all these while, I was there all along."

* * *

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I hope it's not too confusing what with the shift between things that happened in Effie's head and things that happened outside, in real life! It's a bit like Inception except that instead of delving in other people's dream, I just decided to get into Effie's head and create a world for her there.
> 
> I was thinking of making this into a multi-chapter fic but not really sure if I would have the time to. So for now, I shall put this as complete.


End file.
